Jigsaw

"Trace" Lost... and Found

2011-08-10T06:51:00.000-07:00

Why is the show called "Without a Trace?" Wouldn't that just be a show about people who are eternally lost? I mean, the first clue you find... is essentially a "trace" soooo, your not "without." Some quality forethought was put into that one. Too bad I don't have the balls to be a detective in real life. I'm addicted to these freakin shows!

Origin of Mimosa

2011-08-09T06:36:00.001-07:00

A teething toddler sits at my table. Woke up all to early this morning due to daddy's non-graceful clunking around, getting ready for work. There's milk on the floor and peaches in hair, snot on the face and no doggies to clean up the mountain of crushed food on the floor that resembles something I've seen often after getting off a too fast carnival ride. What exactly is it that makes wiping her hands off a prerequisite for digging right back into the slimy leftovers she denied only seconds ago?

It's 9:34 but as wise ones have said before, "It's noon somewhere" and I'm sure their are moms elsewhere silently saying how much easier it would be to greet the days chores if a mimosa was in the opposite hand of the windex. My normally witty mind has given way to this...this...daily routine that feels more like prep to be an entertainer in the circus. Being a parent may be one of the hardest jobs you could ever do. Holding on to your own sanity could provide a very close runner up.

Down A Yellow Brick Road To Neverland

2011-07-31T19:17:00.000-07:00

Hello friends,

It's 10ish on a Sunday night. I'm missing my blog but still feeling uninspired. Where oh where did my creativity go?? That sought after witty thought of mine seems to be lost, on a long overdue vacation, I'm hoping at least so I can live vicariously that way.

If only there were a creativity Buddha, God or higher power to scramble my brain back into it's funk. Where is Bob Ross when you need him?

I never was a fan of Peter Pan or Wizard of Oz when I was a kid but it's times like these I wish I could pop into a childlike moralistic storyline to give me some perspective and imagination.

Chirp, Chirpen Out Some Random.... Bout Damn Time!

2011-04-11T18:15:00.000-07:00

Know what really freaks me out.... When I'm making hard boiled eggs and I hear a little chirpy noise coming from the pan of hot water with eggs in it. Uhh...birdy say what?

I really miss writing on here. Of course it really goes to show how much spare time I had on my hands before since I was able to write regularly without any effort.

On another random note.... Is an Owl considered a bird?? Or, is it like the difference between a newt and a lizard and an amphibian? Why do we have to be so complex anyway?

Case in point: Did you know there are over four hundred freaking shades of white? I mean really??

Is is a "wise tale" or a "wives tale" ?

Being around Avi has given me many ideas for children's books that I think need to be written. Like one about a sock fairy who takes socks off little children's feet so moms and dads can't find them and then mysteriously every time the family is driving down the road they spot socks on the side of the highway ( apparently the sock fairy's hangout???) It could be funny..... right?

Of course I have to share... we taught our little bird right. She recently had her first birthday and after a few mere seconds of attempting to eat with a spoon she shoved all utensils to the side and plunked her face in it. Such a good girl. Mommy was so proud!

2011-02-21T13:04:00.001-08:00

Should being logical still be considered logical in a world that is so illogical??

2011-02-05T16:28:00.001-08:00

Wouldn't it be fun to be judge judy? I want to tell people how ignorant their being and get paid for it!

2011-01-22T09:34:00.001-08:00

Why do people talk without saying anything?

Moment of Clarification

2011-01-19T11:14:00.001-08:00

Karma is only a bitch if you've been a bad person.

Fear me not

2011-01-16T13:16:00.001-08:00

I have often contemplated the question, "what is your worst fear?"

My worst fear is the thought of getting old (in the general sense) scares the bejeezus out of me. I am essentially scared of myself as an incapable self. The thought of not being able to be self-sufficient.

Revamp

2011-01-14T12:16:00.011-08:00

I'm so opinionated that sometimes I think my alter ego would wear a bulldozer costume 24/7. I absolutely love dreaming and I'm utterly addicted to the idea of relativity. Not to mention I'm in a mode of discovery almost permanently yet with the never absent allowance for relativity.

I have been frustrated internally with the idea that I've not kept up on my blogging. Yet we all have lives and well... shit happens right? Here I sit texting this entry because, frankly I temporarily misplaced my determination and I think it finally found its way back to me again. The pool of thoughts in my head is streaming of randomness that I constantly want to express, yet I feel as if they (these random tidbits) are not blog-worthy if the thought is somehow unfinished. Just what is blog-worthy anyway?? So, now I'm questioning... "Why do these thoughts have to be finished in order to maintain some printed existence??"

Sometimes it's meant to be open ended. So it is... and shall continue to be whenever deemed necessary by me and maybe only me and there will be pausing... not ending because you should ask... "Does expression ever completely stop or does it just vacation???"

p.s. Sorry for how this was posted as a mass numbered mess of six chopped up, non-sensible posts. I guess that's the purpose of trial and error. I will give fair warning before posting via text next time. .... and yes,.. damn it... I did edit my posts because I'm a never ending analytic freak of nature and well... things can always be improved upon! :) missed me didn't you?!

I'll Be Damned!

2010-09-25T18:05:00.000-07:00

Well she's definitely our daughter! Beware to adults everywhere, if you were hard on your parents then your children will know. It's a conspiracy or something. The proof:

1. Aviana is getting her first tooth and she is making damn sure we all feel her pain. She has no interest in any of her seven teething, chewy, thingamajigs. (in other word, she has a beautiful feature called a temper, this is not her lovely lady side)

2. She has been giving us hell at bedtime for the past couple night because the horrid devilish mother that I am,... I've taken the pacifier away and yet the instant Time and Steven walk in with Smore's the room is filled with silence and Avi is suddenly busy licking her lips.

3. She is oh so cute and still manages to have the most ornery, mischievous grin. The girl is a monster!

4. Avi has no interest what so ever in rolling over or crawling but she at six months she can almost sit up on her own and she can stand with minimal assistance ( a lack of patience??)

5. Her favorite toy is the Cookie Monster!

6. Did I mention,... she already flirts. That's right, Daddy here is already wanting to lock her away. She gives most males the girly smile where she lifts her shoulders and acts bashful.

Location Device Required

2010-08-22T21:01:00.000-07:00

Seriously I would lose my mind if it wasn't encapsulated inside my cranium! For all the items that are not so delicately snuggled next to my brains though..... please beep or screech or.... I don't know...do a magical jig such as in a cartoon where inanimate objects spring to life. Although my brain is in my head and therefore not fully lost I have theory that it may be slowly be oozing out of ears and nostrils while I'm snoozing at night because it seems every day passes and more random items suddenly disappear.

Speak to me inanimate thing... SPEAK.

There is a wondrous thing happening in our house. All these items just obtained a personality of their own and squealed from dark crevices of our house.. "here I am"

Magical objects now playing -
TV remote - duh
Pacifiers
Left Socks
My half eaten candy bar
Spare parking change
My glasses
Cell phone
Fingernail clippers
Car keys
My stash of big bills - i wish... but the other stuff... in all seriousness... where have they all wondered too? They are ganging up on me, in the corners saying "look at that dumb ass! Shes walking in circles again in a mad hunt to find us. We are the best inanimate object hide and seekers ever! We rule!!"

And this is Erin.. signing off... my brain is officially warped. Sleep is needed desperately for recoup!

Attention, Attention! Bliss Has Arrived!

2010-05-09T19:35:00.000-07:00

I have not abandoned you my friends. At long last I decided I needed to take at least a few minutes to get on here and share the wonderful reason behind my disappearing act. I have neglected this poor blog and my dedicated viewers....but the reason is just so cute!

Everybody, meet our beautiful baby girl, Aviana Loren Mount. She was born on March 28th with a head full of hair ..as shown, and has been wonderful. We are in love, I think we'll keep her!

For now it seems my quick wit has been sucked out of my brain by this beautiful bundle of baby girl using my body as an incubator for the last nine months and a follow up of exhaustion. Its so worth it though. Happy Mothers Day to all the mommies everywhere!

Funny Bone

2010-03-18T17:35:00.000-07:00

Call the chiropractor please! I've had so many muscle aches and pains and bone popping during this pregnancy that at times I have wondered if certain limbs might just fall off. It got me to thinking other stuff too.... cause I'm random like that!

If you constantly lay on one side of your body then do you think your ribs on that side would compress down eventually and not be as wide from the constant weight?

Does your right leg form muscles differently because of the driving process and constant flexing when pressure is applied to the pedal?

Does the hand that you write with have more dexterity and the muscles form differently? Is that hand slightly larger from muscle mass or leaner because it's busier?

If you have bad posture and constantly sit crooked does your tailbone ever begin to curve? Your spine does so....

Are their certain bones in your body that should never pop? After all, the popping sound is a result of air pockets snapping between the bones so...air is harmless right?

How is it that when you break your ribs they just heal themselves with no brace or cast... how do they form in the right shape again??

The Dentist Loves Me!

2010-03-09T07:24:00.000-08:00

Because I love.... Crack Chews! I think that pretty much sums it up. They are horrible for your teeth. It makes Tim laugh when I buy them cause they are European candies and if your just not cool enough to be as immature as we are that translates to "ur a peein candies" I have a major addiction to these things and have otherwise classified them as a more sophisticated, large milk dud:

Root Beer is yet another fave. Their is something nice about having root beer, out of a glass, in a float, foamy from the tap. I do not however enjoy root beer flavored hard candy. It's just not right. It's a frothy drink and that's that. There are two kinds of root beer however. There is root beer meant for floats:

Then there's Barqs which carries the slogan. "Barqs has bite" Bite must be another term for thunderous belching powers. Second classification for root beer is for belching or in this instance conjuring up the leftover airs from your tummy into a big team for general relief and possible musical affect. Outcome is ultimately determined by the drinker!

This SHIT Will Make Us Rich I Tell You!

2010-01-19T14:57:00.001-08:00

Well maybe not.... but regardless it's fun!

As fellow parents know when you have kids running around all the sudden your brain turns to complete crap and your sense of entertainment is left to the toddler songs running rampant through the brain for hours, driving you certifiably insane. Or the other alternative is odd conversations on subjects such as the following due to a lack of sleep, surroundings of children learning of natural body functions and a desperate need to adult time.

So, Rafe and I pursued a conversation of farts. The bathroom is wonderful and intact for the full fledged event of dropping the kids off at the pool but farts go everywhere people and the etiquette is discretionary on an individual basis.

We all just love when that discretion is blinded by our own thoughts too. The classic fartee claiming that their bodily airs do not smell is in need of serious psychological reality check! Anyhow, Rafe and I were thinking, wouldn't it be ingenious to have a fix for that repeat fart offender that we all know?

So, ladies and gentleman.... I would like to announce that probably just for entertainment sake we came up with the idea that their should be scented suppositories! Yeah! Just exactly what your thinking! It would be a scented suppository you could insert on a daily basis. Make it part of the morning routine and when you fart, it smells delightful from the air passing through this revolutionary ass freshener! Like a car tree for your ass! Ah ha ha ha! Seriously....

A gift of sorts that says, no, your farts don't smell but since you have so much wind to spare could you please be the hero of our universe by polluting the air with some wonderful scents so that we don't have to be intoxicated by Joe Schmo over their who smells as if he has leftovers from the 1800's shooting out his anus!

Disclaimer: I have never once claimed that Rafe nor I are sane! We also hold no fellow parents accountable for any of their zany ideas resulting from extreme lack of sleep and chemical imbalances induced by having children! As a quick note for all people interested in future prospects of procreating (aka: time bombs) please BEWARE! Your brain will also go to complete shit!

Willis Say What?

2010-01-18T09:45:00.000-08:00

(Disclaimer some of these. I am not at all trying to be derogatory here people! Just and honest curiosity!)

Do you think the roads that are next to the car wash are cleaner due to all the excess soap and water that runs over them on a regular basis?

Do Black or Asian societies really appreciate blond jokes? Rafe told me that Black people don't like water... cause it messes up their hair. I assume this is somewhat true but I don't think I could have as much appreciation for this as they probably do.

In Asian cultures it is customary to take a quick shower and then to soak in the bathtub. This is also done in pecking order within the family. I'm curious why this tradition came about. How much water does it save? Are there different dermatological issues that go along with this? What about athletes foot?

I am contradictory because I think it's completely wrong that Wendy's has a vanilla frosty. Yet I love the vanilla Oreos. I would even enjoy trying some strawberry Oreos if they were to ever attempt it.

Did you know that apples, onions and potatoes all taste exactly the same if you take away the smell? I love this random info. The world is so much more complex than we give it credit for being. As I've said before... Geniuses can drive themselves insane with the overwhelming amount of knowledge there is.

Hello 2010 Year!

2010-01-08T06:53:00.001-08:00

I would like to start my posts off this year with some music recommendations. Music is one of my biggest loves. A place of solace, beauty, depth. I hope you enjoy these! First one is thanks to a lazy moment in front of the tele watching the Today show.

Break-Up by Pete Yorn and Scarlett Johansson:

My second, thanks to my obsession with the first and therefore plugging into the wonderful sight of Pandora and tada... another goody that I had heard on the radio and hadn't been able to identify.

The Reminder by Feist:

Now back to the regularly scheduled strangeness:

Apparently at the ripe age of 9 children start to lose the ability to use their own eyes and lack all judgement. I thought this was supposed to happen as a teenager. Be warned.. it starts much earlier and continues through the teenage years. I wish somebody would have informed me of this discrepancy in my parent manual.

Garlic is good for a lazy penis! Don't be startled. I was watching this show on Discovery Health last night about how different foods affect our body and apparently Garlic is good for your Jimmy stick! It provides a chemical that increases circulation and stimulates the muscles at the base of the penis. They were trying to see if it was a natural alternative to things like Viagra. Now,... let me just state for total clarity... this is not a problem in our household. Which is obvious since I'm pregnant! I'm all for research that bodes natural remedies instead of pill popping though so I found it interesting. Then I couldn't help but wonder. If Italian guys are loading up on garlic and red wine (oxygenation of the blood) is this perhaps why they are referred to as "Italian Stallions?"

Fun Fact: There is a systematic lull in conversation every 7 minutes.

Melty marshmallows and butter smell like pancake syrup! Does all hot edible fat smell the same?

Enjoy the New Year. This year I look forward to many things. Rafe and I are eagerly anticipating the arrival of our little baby girl Avi. She is a very active kicker which I will get around to posting some video of soon. Another year of watching our boys develop and grow and turn into young men with unique personalities. Another year of life with Rafe which has proven to be a never ending adventure and blessing. This year I will be venturing back into college classes which actually start next week! It may be all the hormones but even on my dumpy days I am feeling very blessed with my life. I am surrounded by beautiful, amazing, family, friends and even the occasional stranger. Life is good.

Apparently...

2009-12-28T18:40:00.000-08:00

Goldfish have memories that only last for three seconds. This must be why they are okay with just swimming around and around in those silly bowls. Actually..... how does a scientist figure something like this out? How do you go about figuring out the span of a memory? Maybe they are really depressed fish and that's why they die so easily?? Or is it because they really do have a short memory and they forget how to breath, eat, poop, exist...

The most fatal car accidents happen on Saturdays. Is this because of all the drinking on Saturday nights? Is it because we let our guards down that we've been carrying around through the week to get us through the stresses of life? Is it just a coincidence? Maybe it's just the defined day for death by car to take place in peoples fates.... How morbid. Maybe we should pray more on Saturdays and give Gods ears a break on Sunday.

** After I type a post I always use the spellcheck button to my advantage. It's my grammar whore. Tonight for the first time ever I received a "no misspellings found." This is a monumental occasion. Just thought you'd like to know!**

Random Entry Number ?

2009-12-27T08:29:00.000-08:00

Overall I believe in recycling. However, sometimes I have to question.... cause that's just what I do people... So the most current thought came this past Wednesday before Christmas when I was in the kitchen ALL DAY BAKING. Literally from 1pm to 1am on Christmas Eve. This sweet tooth mama learns from her love of sugar and I'm one hell of a good baker! So anyways, as I pulled out the box of aluminum foil for like the zillionth time I had to wonder.... is it more cost effective and environmentally friendly to use aluminum foil to save foods or Tupperware? Aluminum foil you have to keep buying every time you run out and then it gets thrown in the trash. Tupperware you only have to buy occasionally when it gets worn down but your also spending the money on dish soap and water every time you wash it. Not to mention that when you do throw it away... does it take a more vigorous process to recycle it since it it a sturdier material?? It's like the dilemma I previously wrote of involving paper cups verses a perma coffee mug. What a pickle!

As I was out doing Christmas shopping this year I ran into many Salvation Army Bell Ringers. This is about the only time that I don't mind going to our local Wal-Mart as opposed to Meijer cause our local Wal-Mart Bell Ringer also plays the saxophone, and isn't that just Merry! I bet he gets upgraded from nickels to quarters for that! I know I enjoy the festive Christmas music being bellowed out into the cold snowiness by a Saxophone. It adds that feel to the atmosphere. Anyways, my thoughts started to rumble a few times when I had no cash to give them cause I mostly have my plastic and I wonder.... do the Bell Ringers struggle with collections more now that plastic has become the main source. Are they going to start putting a card swiper on the red bucket for donations? Maybe they should just put an option on the card swiper in the store when you check out. I'm also always inclined to buy these people a hot coffee cause they are doing a good service and the stores won't even allow them to stand in the double doors. Where is the compassion?

When I went to the book store this season I was struck by an oddity that I began to wonder if it occurred in all the other book stores of this particular name. I will not mention it, but to say it is a widely popular book store across the country so this could be a possible happening in so many places. I was searching for a book in the children's section and as I'm walking, head down, very grossly involved in the titles I suddenly walked one bookshelf to far and went from Dr. Seuss to Dr. Dirty Sex. (Not literally a name) Point is. I looked up, startled and realized that the Romance novels were located smack next to the children's books. With their pictures of swooning, full breasted women and their lovers plastered on the covers sitting right next to the cartoon covers of Strawberry Shortcake and the Grinch. I think a lot of stuff now a days is overly PC but some stuff is just too easy. Don't complain that kids know to much about sex and then give them an invite to crack a book and learn all about it! Idiots! Better yet...when you turned the corner to the next aisle. There was a fine display of Bibles and Spirituality books sitting right next to the Erotica section! EROTICA....with Bibles and lest not forget children's books no more than one bookcase over! Idiots, Idiots, Idiots!!! Erotica should be filed next to Romance and they should both have their own section... next to computer manuals or something that small children are not likely to be around! No fear in boys and girls having sex education class in separate rooms...who cares!!! They are gonna get their long before that cause Barbie is gonna be acting out an erotic seen with Winnie the Pooh! Get your heads out of the clouds people. Stop being PC and overlooking all the obvious!! Kids are not stupid talk to them and quit hiding but don't put it in their hands for them to figure out on their own! Little minds wander too easily and curiosity is their best friend!

Alright...moving on. I'm going to go eat some cookies now and try to figure out the perfect ratio of milk to finish off my Oreo Cookies.

Tweet This & Nutty Curiosities

2009-12-09T05:52:00.000-08:00

Do you think that when birdies have babes they ever get a surprise little one? Does mama bird ever pop out an extra egg? There is no birdie artificial insemination that we know of, so no chances of an octo-bird mom, but what happens when the nest cannot accommodate a surprise egg?

Imagine:

Ma bird: o dear papa, I seem to have squeezed out an extra

mini tweeter.

Pa bird: Better start gathering some spare twigs. We need to make

a nest remodel. Or we will have to move to the rabbit hole.

Do squirrels get tired of eating nuts? What is the equivalent of a big juicy steak to a squirrel? A fancy nut? A chocolate covered nut that has been accidentally dropped by holiday travelers?

Maybe Thanksgiving and Christmas is a favorite holiday among squirrels too! What would happen if a squirrel developed a nut allergy?? Would this be like the plague of squirrels?

Ponder this...

2009-12-03T10:11:00.000-08:00

Sometimes being proper is stupid. "The door is ajar." "No, damn it, it's a door." I know, I know, but couldn't we have come up with something better? There are so many words like this in the English language. No wonder our kids are confused with the hardest language to learn.

Men. They don't have periods, babies taking over their bodies or ripping them apart. All body hair is acceptable, no milk coming out of those nipples, no girlish figure to keep. Although, they do have to have an erection before they can even think about sex, so there!

Have you ever thought about the amount of insect parts that there is inside our food? It's a really gross statistic. Actually, almost all food can become repulsive if you think about it too much. Meat, is an animal. Chocolate and grains are loaded with insect appendages and Cheese,... the moldier the better huh? Ick.

Is it ok, when you have a baby and end up with an episiotomy, for you to ask the doc to throw a few extra stitches in? Or is that just wrong? I mean, we're all human. They should know where your coming from, right?? Don't tell me you haven't thought about it.

Yummy and askew: Cheesy Doritos with ranch dip. Cheese and pickle slice sandwiches. French fries swirled in chocolate Frosty. Popcorn and Milk Duds. I think many foods can be slightly improved by just freezing them and therefore increasing their chewy value.

Germs, Milkshake Run, & Cat-Dog On Crack

2009-11-05T16:47:00.000-08:00

I was horrified the other night on a typical bathroom run at the theatre. I've been watching too much TV entirely lately, and earlier that day I had watched some doctor show where they explained that when you leave the lid up on your toilet seat the bacteria, e-coli and in other words poopy particles fly into the air and spread a radius of up to eight feet. This didn't particularly bother me upon first hearing it since I make a habit of putting my potty lid down at home. However, my whole germaphobic world flipped upside down when I walked into a packed potty at the movies and with all the flushing going on in that room it hit me like a mac truck. There are no toilet lids in here. I'm suddenly surrounded and have in the past been surrounded massive times by lid-less public potties and other grody peoples flying feces and urine particles. EEWWWWWW!!!!!!

Now, appropriately to talk of food. Tim and I made a run to McD's tonight for a well deserved milkshake after raking the leaves from the front yard. I have MASSIVE stock in leaves people! Anyhow, we are sitting there four cars back and Tim says "that guy is ordering so much food I think they might run out of cow" hahahahahaha! Damn, that kid is funny! It's times like that in which I am so proud and have no problem claiming his as my son.

Last, because none of my items never connect on a normal thought pattern. I thought it would be fun to show you a picture of our kitty Ferb. Cause he smokes a crack pipe while we are out and he's totally great for entertainment because of it. This is not him playing. This is how he watched TV.

Oh,.. and he is also our dog. He's dual purpose. He has the personality of a dog on most days with the exception of eating anything up from the floor. I've already informed Rafe that when this baby becomes a Cheerio eating toddler we need to be ready to invest in a dog. It's just better to have a self motivated vacuum.

Gone To Shit! My Brain That Is...

2009-10-25T15:14:00.001-07:00

Really! I haven't posted on here lately, and as I question why I only have one answer. I have been so freaking busy lately that my only spare, thought involved, non-planning and random fun thoughts that I have had are things with the likes of this following question.

How do companies such as Charmin, Angel Soft, White Cloud etc... test their product? Toilet paper that is. I was wondering how the product testing of these companies is assembled.

Are their specifics to testing ass paper? I mean, we all know they have to test their products. So,..toilet paper. Is there a group of employees that take product home to test and report their findings after wiping? Do they really go through the trials and tribulation of possibly having a crappy product? (Pardon the pun) Are they at home cursing their work like most Americans but due in part to product testing leading to poo on their finger when the paper is too flimsy or scratchy on their arse or heaven forbid they get a urinary infection due to the perfumes or textures of various TP's. Is their workers comp for an overly scratched ass?

Maybe instead of putting their employees through testing they are a more caring employer and use dummy dolls. Is their a group of dummy dolls produced that actually poops and pees? They can make the waterbaby, baby doll so surely this is attainable. So they could just use dummy dolls and mechanical ass wiping devices and then what? A panel of people sit around in a semi-circle assessing the usage of toilet paper to a dummies ass? Noting things on their paper like minor irritations or paper remnants left stuck in the crack?

I imagine if I ever had a job in a company of this nature I would send my resume straight to the product testing of flush ability. That has to be much less invasive. Yet not as comical...hmmm.

Anyhow, as you can see. these are my most interesting random thoughts lately and it's a bit disturbing. Even to my own maniacal self. My head is officially in the shitter!

Check It

2009-10-02T16:20:00.001-07:00

The update... I'm starting college in January. College and a baby. Don't roll your eyes. You all knew I was crazy and thrive on being too busy! Besides, this is how I did college the first time around so why screw with a good thing right?

I've had a mega sweet tooth. More than normal which verges on needing to surgically insert a pixie stix fountain in my mouth. Maybe the dentist could fill up that throat hangy thing with sugar that would be like a permanent hard candy! Yeah, what an invention that would be.

I noticed a medical transport van today that had a sign posted on the window and said "no smoking." The van needed to install a second sign reading "if you can't read, don't ride in my van" cause the passenger was puffing away on a cancer stick and all I could think was "i hope you blow up because your smoke lingers and mixes with some gases coming from whatever your transporting. Dumbass! I think I have some hormonal issues. Ignore that for the next seven months.

Are 11 year olds really supposed to know what Mauve, Puce and Indigo are? When Tim brings me homework I don't know how to do I get a little worried. Either my brain is mush or they are teaching crap he may never use. Like what a Chrysalis is.

Does anybody enjoy the show "Trading Spouses?" What is wrong with the world?

So, I'm headed to school for nursing. My Etsy shop "Mansacoe" is going to be launched around the first of the year as well. Still haven't found any official work but I've been keeping busy. Where are all my readers anyways? Did you all fall into a black hole of abomination? Peeps?

A Late Night Pick Up

2009-09-19T09:43:00.000-07:00

For some reason sitting at a stoplight on my way home from the movies last night I was suddenly plagued with curiosity as to why a limo would ever be parked in front of a CVS pharmacy. My thoughts only lead to two conclusions.

Opt. 1

Things went well and they decided to stop for the infamous box of fun time safety balloons. Good for them and their pre-thought.

Opt. 2

They took part in entirely too much "punch" and need to pick up some Tylenol and maybe 7-up. At which point I am forced to say. You should grab a box of balloons too my friend. Get the balloons. Either for proper usage in case or animal balloons cause your just that far off the cliff.

In conclusion. I think stoplights shouldn't have such long intervals. It went entirely to far. Where the hell is that off switch???

Ramble On Rambler...

2009-09-10T07:47:00.000-07:00

Hi friends! I suppose by now you all miss me terribly. I am so sorry. I know the days are dreadful without me.....err.....maybe not.

I have kept busy lately with the small stuff. Cleaning house constantly, buying pants to accomodate my tummy and realizing that although they are not flattery they are super comfy. You know that moment when you eat too much food or you pass on from a very filling dinner only to indulge in dessert and then your sitting there at the table thinking "o dear Lord I cannot wait to get out of these tight jeans and into a pair of sweat pants" You should just invest in maternity jeans. Jeans from the hip down and plenty of stretchy indulge room hidden under that shirt. O yeah! You wait, one of these days I bet there will be a news report of some wife that came home to find her husband on the couch with a pint of ice cream and maternity pants on! What a smart dude.

Factoid: Incredible but True: Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.

Laura recently informed me that the mosquitos are probably having their Thanksgiving feast upon my flesh due, as opposed to the full house of dudes that I live with, to the increased blood flow. O the joy! I must say too that the worst possible f**king place to get a mosquito bite has to be on the knuckle of your finger. How much blood could possible be obtained there anyways? What a total bitch to scratch. I feel as if I'm trying to rip the skin from my finger.

I may be going back to school this coming January. I went yesterday to talk to an admissions advisor and filled out Fafsa forms so we'll see. Guess I should make a decision as to what the hell I'm going back to study. Something in the health field. Regardless, I will hopefully move on from the art struggle and be able to enjoy it once again when it is only a hobby and not a means of bill paying. Sometimes, doing what you love as a career only makes it more of a job and less of a passion.

As for final thoughts.....why does the thought of a warm glass of milk sound repulsive but milk in my hot tea is ok? Also, why do we refer to it as a grilled cheese sandwich when its actually the bread that is grilled? What the hell is lip gloss and chapstick made from that it's ok to lick your lips? I'm a chapstick fanatic, FANATIC. So, when they finally do an autopsy on me is there going to be like a mini chapstick factory inside my tummy? It has to be bad somehow...right? Then again, I still firmly believe that the FDA is out to get us all.

Mind Dribble

2009-08-24T05:50:00.000-07:00

Rafe and I were vegetating on the couch last night when a commercial came on for First Response pregnancy test. I never realized before that in the commercial it states claim as this. "Can provide an answer five days before a missed period." Correct me if I'm wrong or just having another case of mush brain but doesn't this mean you have to miss your period first??? If you take it before your period then how the hell do you know if you missed it? They need to be more thorough with their words. That's a pet peeve of mine. "Results five days before your expected period" or something.

As I sat here having my seventh meal of the day on Saturday I was struck by an oddity. I was having grilled cheese and tomato soup and thought, I'm eating fruit soup. Hot fruit soup. Suddenly it wasn't as appealing. I mean, I wouldn't eat hot pineapple soup or hot orange soup. Although I do enjoy some hot apples in non-soup form. mmmm.

I'm going to talk to some student advisers at the local colleges this week. I've been really tossing around the idea of going back to school. I think I may take a class at Herron in painting just as a stepping off point. To get me back into the swing of classes. I'm super excited. I've always wanted to take courses in painting. I'm still having a hard time figuring out what I want to get a degree in though. I have many factors to contemplate. I don't want to go for four years. So an associates it is. I want something that will provide me with a little more flexibility in my career but passionately fulfilling. I've tossed around so many thoughts and they are a wide range but I have high interest in all.

Dental Hygiene, Clinical Therapy Massage, Social Work, Civil Rights, Journalism. I need help here people. Thoughts?? I realize what your thinking too. Why am I starting with painting when none of these are art related degrees. I want to do the painting as a serious hobby. I have to keep in mind taking a course that I'm not so worried about the grade though since I will be taking it during a semester in which I will be also having this babe. It's simply to get me in motion. The wheels turning. So....help people. It takes many people to push a stalled car. I need feedback please peeps :)

Lost And Found

2009-08-22T14:54:00.000-07:00

Having a child has many astounding affects on many people. If it does one thing to everybody though it's this. The searching. The sudden realization to stop, pause life, reflect, gather and contemplate. To go over the things in your life which you know or have learned thus far and simply....ponder. It's interesting to me today that, that very thing is the reason I started this blog. To ponder. Life, the ins, outs, complexities and oddities. To share the joy I take in finding the quirks. Here I am now, being brought through so much more to ponder. Maybe that just confirms that I was on the right path all along. So, I am here to share. These are the thoughts that have been racing lately. The lost and found moments of recent if you will....

Finding a beautiful moment in time. Occasionally in my life I have found myself struck by these absolutely amazing moments. Never when I expect them, but always when I seem to most need them. I get lost in myself sometimes. We all do. Caught up in the everyday junk. Caught up in the sadness's and pessimism's of life and not being grateful or simply not understanding why we face so many challenges. For me though, when that moment hits. That peace finally arises it makes all the other stuff worth it. The small stuff is truly what matters for me. I found a moment this evening. I have been sad, confused, madly in love, blessed, happy and strangely wonderful lately. I sit here this afternoon though. A beautiful inspiring moment having landed in my lap when I needed it most. Sia is playing in the background, candles are lit and the smell is intoxicating. The sun glimmers little bits of light through the trees surrounding my cozy space. The wind is blowing just a slight breeze, kissing everything lightly as it passes, the leaves rustling and a slight chill in the air. A moment of pure peace to reflect. I love these moments.

A donut can cure most hungry ills, and three cold chocolate donuts in a matter of two hours can even cure a pregnant woman's ills!

A lesson learned by expansion. I recently reinforced in a friend, a valuable lesson that was told to me when becoming a parent the first time around. A lesson that is simple enough. Sometimes however we need reminding. "It is always harder to be a good parent." I have always only thought of this lesson so blatantly in this context. Parenting. How naive of me. Fact is, it's is harder to do anything the right way. That's what gives the feelings of success though. The getting through it. I know its not easy to do the right things in life. It is worth it, but not easy. In reminding my friend of this, I reminded myself. Funny how that works.

Who remembers Nell?? The movie Nell. That woman was free. With the fear of sounding half witted over here. I have those moments when all I want to do is throw my hands in the air and dance around half hazard without any inhibition.

At some moment we are all our parents aren't we? If that's not a lesson in parenting then I don't know what is.

An angst filled love with fate. Dear Lord, life has shown me a tough path at certain turns in the road. I have days when all I want to do is fall to pieces and cry from the tiredness that takes over my body. In these moments I ask repeatedly, screaming, "why" I just want to see. Praying "God just give me the strength." I always pull through. The pieces always come together and the beautiful twisted story of events that lies behind is always, always an incredulous moment in my life that leads to such knowledge that at times it feels I may not be able to carry it all around. I may topple. I feel so blessed. Blessed to have made it through the tragedies that have struck so that I can realize and appreciate even the hard times.

The deep is just that. Deep. Life is so amazingly beautiful!

Prego. Holy Shit.. It's In Where?

2009-08-09T15:49:00.000-07:00

That's right folks. This lady is Prego and that was pretty much my reaction when I found out too. I've been pregnant before, so, yes, I do realize how this works. I can say with assurance though that Rafe and I were both very surprised to find a positive pee on a stick, so surprised that I peed on another one and then went to the doc too just for "third times a charm" benefits. We are very excited to be having a little babe added to our family and it has, so far, just showed me again why I love Rafe. He has been so attentive and sweet. He is a pretty great guy!

So, along with this news has come the added bonuses of nausea, extreme need for sleepy time, hunger at all hours, emotional dramatization, and mommy potato brain. Or, aka...my brain has turned to mush!

The nausea has been a real pain in my ass cause unlike my pregnancy with Tim where I had "morning sickness" this is lasting all day long, every day, and even night. So not cool. I can't stand being an emotional wreck, especially when there is no rhyme or reason and it is purely hormonal. I apologize now to anybody that I scream, cry, laugh, or growl at in a completely inappropriate state.

The fun side. Mush brain! Some of you that read this may not realize what exactly I'm referring to. When a woman is pregnant her body is so out of whack and she has so much going on that she starts to do really stupid things and looses all sense of logic. Such as example number one: making a bowl of cereal for breakfast and then placing it in the freezer and going to watch the morning news.....therefore not eating the cereal or even realizing what you have done until you have half frozen mini wheat floating in milk ice!! WTF?? I must say at this point that I'm not sure if it's because I'm older that this is happening sooner in prego months, or the hormones are just extra crazy from that Colombian lovin. However, in previous Tim pregnancy this didn't start happening to me until I was about 7 months and I only had one thing that I did repeatedly and that was to leave the keys in the car, running after I would get home from work. Not sure why...maybe my hormones were just out to destroy the planet with carbon gases.

This pregnancy though, has already embarked on my stupid ass brain as noted in frozen floaters above. I have also translated needing two vitamins a day into "I need to buy two bottles". These are the same kinds of vitamins AM and PM mind you. I have left to babysit the Bennington Babes and left my house unlocked and doors wide open for a period of 7 hours simple cause I forgot that you close the door when leaving the house.

Last but not least the cat incident. I have noticed that Ferb kitty is on me constantly. I realize that animals have sensory about these sorts of situations but he is driving me bonkers!! He follows me EVERYWHERE and when I'm standing in one spot for more than two minutes he jumps UP my leg. As if to say "hey lady, your pregnant, sit the fuck down and take it easy." He even follows me to the bathroom, which is my incident theme room. I came home today from shopping. I was the only person in the house at this point and was not expecting company any time soon. As I walk to the bathroom, of course the dad cat follows his prancy ass behind me at which point I kick him out of the bathroom so that I can pee in peace and then I lock the door. Let's see...I LOCKED THE DOOR!!! Like that fraking cat is going to climb up and unlock it because he's just that interested or even cause he can....What?? I locked the door.I locked the door so the cat couldn't get into the bathroom people! Geez.

You know. I think there is a Dane Cook skit about things like this. Somebody help me!!! No wonder moms have that lasting effect of mom mush brain when they go to call their child's names and end up calling out every other persons name they've ever met before finally landing on the child's name that the frustrations were meant for. Thank god Rafe is moving in so that I don't do something crazy like super glue my ass to the floor or something!

Need Stimulation!

2009-07-30T08:49:00.000-07:00

I feel like I'm losing my mind over here! I've been off work for two weeks now and although I have been very busy trying to obtain those personal goals of launching the "fidge" invitation site on Etsy. I am starving for other human interaction. I went out to dinner the other night with a girlfriend and for two hours straight I talked and talked and barely ate and talked some more. I don't think either of us came up for air until we got in our cars to go home!

I am loving that I can stop and do things around the house when need be or make a run to the grocery with only a two second previous plan consisting of the thought " I need ice cream." However, yesterday it hit me like a ton of bricks. I need people!! I realize this is why I switched majors in college too. I had started out in computer programming cause I am one mega nerd at heart and I naturally understand that junk but being a hermit was hard times for me. Then onto nursing which was all wrong. I'm not even sure what led me there except that It was all about the people and somehow I ended up walking through the school art gallery and the rest was history.

I'm really enjoying my creative time when it is just that...creative. I feel lately though as if I'm not getting enjoyment out of it because it has become more of a money making necessity. I want to make the money at it when I'm not dependant upon it for things like food and shelter. I would love to be able to go back to school right now but my head is so clouded I can't even figure that out and where the hell to begin. Wouldn't it be nice if we could all just pick the job we really want and learn it. There would be no, "you can't get this job because you do not currently qualify." I think I would like to work for the local arts council. Or the Herron School. To no avail though, they do not have job openings. Poo!

I realize this blog is an open session of thoughts. That's what I do right? I am officially conversing with my computer as if it were human. It could be worse right?

Back In The Swing, err Saddle

2009-07-21T07:16:00.001-07:00

***Disclaimer: Do NOT proceed to read this bit if you get offended easily or have young ones around capable of reading. If you read this post thinking you are not the easily offended type and then end up offended, well,...I warned you!

I'm curious as to the specific details of hot dairy. I found myself watching a food show yesterday and wondering...why is it that we can cook with cheese and milk in the oven or on stove top. Getting it hot and gooey and it's oh so good. Yet, if you leave a jug of milk out on the counter till it's warm it spoils into a chunky paste of putrid smells? I know it's some chemical reaction, bacterial killing blah blah jargon. I'm just finding it odd that I've never thought of the connection before.

Something to chew on: "Incredible but True: According to one theory, people who chew a lot of ice have a high sex drive." Now at this point most men are joyously hopping in the vehicles to drive to the nearest store and purchase massive quantities of ice trays, Popsicles and extra freezers for their households. Here hunny, have a Popsicle. Psst...it doesn't work like that boys! I wonder what the correlation is between this and women craving ice when they are pregnant.

As I was watching Ferb (kitty) eat his food last night I was thinking how similar it must be to prison. I get total enjoyment out of eating food. I relish in trying new flavors and satisfying those cravings for pizza, or dessert or a big steak and mashed potatoes on a cold day. I can't imagine running up to my dinner plate with the same anticipation on the twentieth day in a row of receiving chicken and salmon flavored bits of crunch! I'm not sure what they feed you in prison / jail, but I hope it compares to kitty kibble cause I don't think they should be allowed to indulge in the enjoyment that is delicious food!

And last but not least. A factoid that makes me never want to think of a swing or riding saddle again. I found this fact this morning and imagine this is similar torture to a man thinking of getting his balls chopped off. Yet is quite possibly the best day ever for any Egyptian researcher discovering it. "Incredible but True: Cleopatra had stones inserted in her vagina to prevent her from getting pregnant." Talk about a girl getting attached to her Bedazzler!

What I'll Be When I Grow Up

2009-07-20T12:19:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it. I'm sitting here and it seems I'm perfectly content with the idea that I don't know what I want to do with my career. I know I love art and all things creative and apparently that's all my little heart desires to be content. Oh the many avenues that I could travel down on my next career venture. Honestly the harder part of it all is deciding which one I want to tackle.

Rafe recently told me that he thought I should write. I didn't even know I was good. I just enjoy it. I have been concentrating on designing more invitations to start the Etsy shop and still really have my head stuck on that at the moment. I have to remind myself to not Google and look up other invitations though cause then I see really cool stuff that I'm not sure my work will ever compare against. It has taught a good lesson that there is always more to strive for though. I could decorate cakes and other sweet lovely confections because God has blessed me with not only creative talent but great palette and of course the ability to rhyme like Dr. Seuss cause it makes any day better when you can do that! I would really love at some point to refinish some furniture pieces and start selling them on consignment. For now though that one will have to wait. As I have not taken time to learn this skill yet and I would bet it requires many proper tools. So,...at last...these are my thoughts for now. Contemplating the options. Daydreaming in my head and eventually I will probably end up flipping a coin to decide my destiny. After all, It's in Gods hands.

Well Friends

2009-07-17T05:24:00.000-07:00

It seems I may be absent from posting for a bit. I was let go from my job yesterday so it seems I will be busy putting on a monkey suit and interviewing for a bit. Peddling my skills and magnificent personality! Wish me luck.

Some Days Are Questionable

2009-07-14T10:29:00.000-07:00

I noticed this morning while sitting at my desk sipping my coffee (or rather chocolate / coffee flavored water) that I was super hungry. I typically don't eat breakfast, which I realize is a bad habit, but I'm just not a morning riser and therefore my body does not function tasks in the morning like making toast. If I attempted such a task I may set my arm on fire or better yet the house! So, anyways, back to hungry, sitting at my desk. I realize that for my snack options at work I seem to have pigeon holed myself recently. For this is a list of choices: instant oatmeal that's been in my drawer since November, mmm no, Mandarin Oranges in fridge, Clementine in purse still, or Orange that's been sitting on desk for about a week. Hmmmm...

Is there a sign up sheet for future jaundice patients cause with this much vitamin c surrounding me I'm becoming seriously nervous. Why the hell do I have so many versions of orange??? Weird..but not my worst addiction to date so I shrug it off and opt for the clementine.

I also noticed this bizarre scene on the way to lunch the other day and decided to take a picture because it was obviously an interesting story!

That, my friends, is a homeless persons bed, or quite possibly a squirrels cloud like trampoline, maybe a really crazy, drunken pillow fight broke out and this is the remnants! A pillow! In the middle of the street??? I'm voting for homeless guy who wanted a warm bed and decided to sleep on the hot pavement. He's possibly drunk too. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. Maybe I should go lay an orange next to the pillow and then he can have a nice snack or orange slice for his beer. The world would be a happy place and then we could all exchange high fives. For my new homeless friend I am posting directions on how to proceed in this celebratory act because, you know, when we drink our skills become impaired. Good times, good times!

Marketing = Deception? Oh No...Never

2009-07-08T06:12:00.000-07:00

Alright,...seriously? I caught this commercial on TV this weekend, and for all I know this machine may work very well. Here's my beef though. Just cause you get skinny, doesn't mean you get tan too. Check it out, at about 47 seconds into the video. Unless this thing is shooting out ultraviolet rays or spraying fake tan on while you swivel. Or maybe they are suggesting that the more you sweat the more you run your tiny hiney to a fake bake to hide the cellulite cause you know when you ditch a ton of weight that shit dimples. I see this all the time and the point needs to be made that they are cushioning beauty with bullshit! Do people really believe this stuff?

I Like To Screw With Your Head

2009-06-30T06:15:00.000-07:00

I was thinking that the next time I need to aerate my lawn instead of spending money on a machine I'm just going to invite a bunch of girlfriends over, require they wear high heels and have a dance party in the front yard. That should work right?

Ramen noodles are really a fabulous thing if you just add meat. Whatever flavor the noodle, add the corresponding meat, and maybe a fortune cookie for giggles.

I have tried for years to be less clumsy. Now I've come to terms and I'm just happy to be short. The taller you are the further you have to fall. Not to mention that it also leaves more body space to drop food on. I may drop dinner and dessert on myself all the time because of the hole in my lip, but it doesn't go far, and therefore makes the five second rule that much more appealing.

I've realized that it's next to impossible for me to be in a bad mood when listening to the Beastie Boys. If I'm not laughing at the lyrics, I'm trying to sing them and it's just a damn good time.

What is the purpose of a mosquito? Some bugs eat other bugs or feed the soil for plants to grow or pollinate flowers. Mosquitoes feast on us. What eats them? What is their job. Why God..why?

Lets say a woman has breast implants, and then dies, and years later her body has disintegrated into a skeleton. What happens to the implants? Are they there just rotting in the ground? If they are is this going to eventually build up and cause some sort of weird effects in the soil? Some chemical mixture that is essentially pollution? Or maybe they take that stuff out during em bombing? Morbid, I know.

What ever happened to Bonkers candy? The things that were like Starburst only better.

I've never smoked either but what about candy cigarettes? Seriously who thought this was a legit idea? Yet they were oh so good. Addictive. Much like the real thing I suppose.

Future Etsy Shop

2009-06-24T04:59:00.000-07:00

Since my "Creative Genius" post I've had a few inquiries as to what exactly I would be designing and selling. As well as some people even asking what Etsy is. So in effort to tie up some loose ends. Etsy is, in my mind, the "be all" site for creative people like myself who love to create and dabble in the art world but haven't found their niche. There are so many things you could purchase on the site. Just think of areas such as artwork, accessories, fashion and gifts. There are people from all over the world in one place to share, sell, dabble and be aesthetic. It's great! If you want to check it out personally there is a link on this page under sites. Or of course you could just type it in http://www.etsy.com/

As for what I will be selling. I still have not narrowed it down completely. I am starting with wedding invitations and will be expanding from there. Possibilities include other party invitations, place cards, greeting cards and such. I would love to eventually dabble in other things as well. I've always had an urge to take a course in refinishing furniture and upholstery. I would love to get old antique pieces and update them while still preserving the vintage characteristics. Think: eclectic, modern, bohemian. For now though, I still have a "day job" and a mortgage so I'm starting with invitations. I've included a sneak peak of some designs below. Let me know what you think. A great artist needs feedback!

Simplicity:

Culture:

Alternative Punk:

A Washing Machine That Makes Cheese?

2009-06-23T15:42:00.000-07:00

At least thats the link that I stumbled upon today while reading articles on MSNBC. It's really about more than just a washing machine making cheese. It gets to the "think outside the box" adage. Which is desperately needed in an economy such as our current one. I was intrigued and actually left a little unsatisfied because I simply wanted to hear more. So, check it out. If nothing else it should stir up your brain waves which is always a personal goal of mine. I like to dig in peoples brains!

Anyway, click on the title above and be intrigued!

On other notes. I actually was going to write a much longer blog today and this thing we call "a paycheck" took over instead. I don't like to break promises though so I made sure to share. Aren't you just tickled pink? Check back though. I had a very odd day today and I'm highly anticipating the formulation of it into a blog!

Slacker AKA..Creative Genius!

2009-06-22T13:05:00.000-07:00

That's what I feel like. I've seriously slacked on this blog the past month. I promise I will grab my journal and make a real post tomorrow cause I know that your lives will never be the same if I don't. Your just sitting there aren't you? Waiting, counting away the seconds until my next eagerly anticipated post because you have nothing better to do.

Seriously, kidding!

I have gotten so caught up in my other side projects that I've slacked on this one. I have many kettles brewing. I've had my hours cut at work, much like three fourths of the country and therefore have had to find part-time gigs to fill the gaps. This isn't working out well considering that people have a hard time wanting to hire somebody for one day a week.

SO, I finally made a decision last week to take matters truly into my own hands. I'm starting a store. An Etsy shop to be exact. I still have mega amounts of work to do before launch. Such as figuring out a name for my shop and chucking up a store policy and standard color palette and such, but the nice part is my education in Graphic Design will finally be put to some good use and I don't have to compete in a monkey suit and interview to do it. Whahoo! I'm really pretty excited. Can't you tell? I've also decided I will link it to another blog here so that I can be a selling fool. Ah the creative genius that I wield. (evil laughter ensue here.....)

Stay tuned!

DNA Swap?

2009-06-11T05:08:00.000-07:00

As I was watching the news last night I was entranced by our newscaster. Was he telling an interesting story? No. In fact most of the time I try not to watch the news because it's always full of pessimism and that rubs off you know! Was he hott with a double T? No. Did he have a booger cutting loose from his nose or hair falling out or was he dressed in clown apparel? No, no and no! For some reason though I was lost in that state of mind that says "there is something, something about you." Then, it hit me!

This is the newscaster:

And this is what I was thinking:

Now that's just uncanny! Right down to the glassy glimmer in his eye. Can I get a woot woot? Anybody? Dr. I think there has been a mix-up at the sperm bank!

Things That Make You Go "Hmm" 2

2009-05-30T17:34:00.000-07:00

Today's randomness.

I was wondering just how much gas you could save in a years time if you simply buckle up before starting the car.

Do you think there are more cases of people with skin cancer on the left side of their body? Since that's the side that gets more sun on a constant. Think about it. When your driving in your car, the left arm and side of face have sun at all times but the right side is pretty blocked. Now, what would be even more interesting. If they did this as an actual study and found that skin cancer was in fact more common on the left side of the body and perhaps due to this little theory of mine. Then, my next question would further into having a test done in Europe, Australia and other countries that drive on the opposite side. Would they have a higher occurrence of skin cancer on the right side of their bodies?

Why is it that I can set the font on this blog at Trebuchet, Small on a Mac and it's different than on a PC. Why? I know a lot about computers and even a lot about fonts, true types ect. I did take typography class. I even took computer programming. Yet this, I don't understand.

Why do I think like this? Is it normal? Do I want to be normal? What defines normal? Is it all subjective? Is there anything that is not subjective? Truly?

KOL

2009-05-21T11:12:00.000-07:00

Awww, the heavens parted and there it fell from the sky. A wondrous silver disk with this music on it called Kings Of Leon. Okay, so maybe that's overdoing it but in all seriousness, what a great CD!!

Anybody who knows me at all will come to know that I am a huge, HUGE music fan. If I weren't so penniless then I would take stock in a music store and fill it with my own personal collection! Might I add while on this topic, that the best music stores are the hole in the wall ones with people behind the counter who actually appreciate the music more than their paycheck.

Even for a junkie though, there are times of boredom and non-impressiveness. I feel as if over the past 6 months of music there has been a very "predictable" atmosphere in the music world. Well, the forecast has changed...at least in my book. Rafe and I recently picked up this CD for his trip to Europe. He had asked me to gather some names of new CD's he may want to purchase so that he'd have some new music. I think he was expecting a handful of new band options and I produced thirty! Junkie, junkie, junkie, music is my crack people. I love how it can take you to another place. It can ease your emotions, make you feel like your not alone, transform your mood. Not to mention, buying a new CD ties in my love for Graphic Design and getting to see a glimpse into the artist mind by looking through the booklet is comparable to the joy I get out of eating fudge on Christmas! Tangent sorry.

So back to my point. This new CD was a nice break from the pack. A breath of fresh air. To make it even more exciting, they are playing at Red Rocks in Colorado this August!!! RED ROCKS...excuse me while I squeal with excitement. OMG, I so want to go to this concert. I may throw my sleeping back and some munchies in the car and drive my ass out there! I love Red Rocks! Best venue I've been to so far. That's another blog for another time. So check out Kings Of Leon. I've included their link and a picture of their CD so you can see what the hell I'm talking about

Doodle 4 Google

2009-05-14T11:37:00.000-07:00

I am a huge supporter of the arts in general. I was sent an email today about this contest that Google has in which kids from different age groups submit doodles for the Google logo. It was really cool to see, and each kid gives a reason as to why they drew what they did based on what their one wish for the world would be. I've included some of my faves so you can see what the hell I'm rambling about! I wish they had a category for adults...I want to do one!

This one is by Anagha Kangovi from Georgia:

This one is by Emerald Lu from Kentucky:

And this one by Zoe Brants from Washington:

Aren't they cool?! So, go check it out and vote for one!
Do it here: http://www.google.com/doodle4google/vote.html Support the arts!

Observation Deck

2009-05-08T10:41:00.000-07:00

Rafe is in Europe for a month. He's only been gone a week and I miss him like I have never missed anybody else. I didn't even know in 28 years of life that I could feel like this. Of course if I thought about him every second of the day I'd be tempted to hop a plane and fork the bill to my closest Visa at hand. I've kept busy observing and here's a few notable things.

I think it's funny when I see a sign on a building that says "parking in rear." I know it's immature, but come on, it's funny!

Bugs have the most terrifying life. Constantly worrying about getting killed by a human who is 1000 times their size. They can just be cruisin along and all the sudden somebody walks in the room and flicks on a light. FREEZE, OH SHIT...not the shoe,..at least give me a Kleenex..soft death. I mean really. What goes through their minds?

It occurred to me recently that there is more school bus activity in a poor or moderate income neighborhood. It makes sense of course that those families probably can't afford to buy cars for their teens and therefore they are still riding the bus. So I wonder if that plays into the school budget at that point. Because they have to maintain more buses. Or does it change the psyche of those teenagers? Does it make them less independent? Or are they more independent because they are more likely to deal with hardships?

I love frozen Laffy Taffy. It's like a non-melting Popsicle. Could you ask for anything more?

When your trying to save money at the grocery store, your food items typically end up requiring that you have a mass ownership of bowls. For the soup and Ramen noodles!

I think the phrase "distance makes the heart grow fonder" needs a tweaking. I think "distance makes the emotions grow stronger." It's all dependant on what the emotion is. Trust me, I've been grateful for the breathing room before. If your in love with somebody, or already fond of them though it's a different story. It can make you miss them so badly that you have a constant stomach ache from wanting them around.

So thank Rafe (seen below) for this weeks observations. Isn't he handsome with the look of "what the hell are you doing?"

Fast Food Pays The Bills?

2009-05-06T05:40:00.000-07:00

I recently noticed on my receipt from Taco Bell that they have a survey on the back and it states that one customer every week wins $1,000 bucks or something of that nature. I've noticed these before from other places too. You know, Target, the grocery store, etc... It didn't hit me until yesterday, but do people really ever win money from these things? Does anybody even participate in the surveys? Or does everybody slough it off like I do, thinking it's silly and impossible, and so the money just sits there? Is there really any money at all to be won? Maybe there isn't and it's just a way to get your opinions. I mean, have you ever actually heard of somebody who won money from a survey for a store or fast food place or from the yearly Monopoly game from McDonald's? Anybody? Is it legal for them to not award somebody? What about Wheel Of Fortune? Everybody got a Wheel Watcher number? Cause I know I do! Maybe if I sat at home and did surveys all day I would actually become rich. I want a full report from the professionals on this. Whoever they are. Who knows!

Sugar Doesn't Disappoint

2009-04-30T12:20:00.000-07:00

Last night Tim and I had breakfast for dinner. This happens often because it's just easy and cheap. It's better than the alternatives of having gone on a rampage in the kitchen and then peering out of the fridge and saying "lets eating icing for dinner." Icing on a spoon...YUM! This is one aspect where I am totally the child and he is the parent. I would love to eat pie for dinner. It has fruit in it so that's gotta count for something right? But what kind of mother would I be? Let's face it though. Sugar is awesome.

I was eating my bowl of cereal and some toast and within minutes there are all sorts of complexities that I should have been warned about. I should have been more prepared. Had more planning. I should have eaten my toast first before having poured the cereal. I don't like my toast cold, or soggy for that matter from the butter having soaked up the top dermis of bread. Like pancakes. You don't pour syrup all over the top cause then it's all soggy and gross within minutes like a toddler let it sit in his cheeks and get all slobbery and then put it on your plate. EW! You cut up the pancake and then dunk.

So there I am having made my cereal and toast at the same time. Scarfing down the bread like a wild beast before it gets cold and soggy and then as I turn to start my cereal...oh yeah, it's soggy too! What a pickle I'm in. All this soggy food and no time for enjoyment. Now, I'm thinking, if only I had cookies. I like them soggy! All milk soaked and crumbly, falling apart into sugary bliss the minute it's popped into my mouth. Cold, hot,..it doesn't matter. It's oh so good!

Constant Searching

2009-04-29T08:33:00.000-07:00

Some days I feel as if I may never find my path. I can't yet seem to find that connection between all the things I love to dabble in. That blend that would define their purpose for me. I can feel it lurking there though. That "something" that will one day be known as my niche. Until then I try to remind myself of these wise words.

"All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It puts content in my heart for now. I am one experimenting fool. Just call me Brain. "Tonight, Pinkie, we will take over the world" With decorating cupcakes that is! Cupcakes and great music!!! More on this later...

It's Earth Day People!

2009-04-22T08:22:00.000-07:00

As a celebration of Earth Day I thought I would show a few items that perked my own interest and are deemed "eco-friendly." Enjoy!

This first item I found at http://www.thisnext.com/ . Just search on the site for Solar Sun Jar. It's a portable light that you can set outside in the sun and then carry it anywhere. Apparently it is powered for 5 hours! It's like non-flickering candlelight...oohhh, ahhhh!

I picked one of my favorite mugs to put on here too. Simply because it helps to not throw away paper cups all the time and you can even use them as a bowl too. For ice cream and soup and snacks ect... It's more fun that way! This is from Lollipop Pottery. They have a cute little birdie mug too!

This item I found on http://www.etsy.com/ . Store name is WasteNotSaks, all together like that too. So you can search under store names and find these. They are a fairly good price too. From what I gather they are reusable, machine washable Ziploc bags. They come in fun designs too. Bonus!

Last but not least. This one also from http://www.thisnext.com/ . A staple free stapler! I'm excited not only for the earth friendly factor but I am one of the idiots who seems to get hurt with staples, so, yah! Apparently it makes a tiny cut and fold in the paper that holds it together. Neat! Oh, and you can get it at Office Depot.

A Bowl Substitute

2009-04-21T07:42:00.000-07:00

I started this blog in part because I felt the need to give back. I am a huge blog reader. I like to regularly read multiple blogs and feel it is necessary in order to meet my need for quirky humor. See list of "Blogs I Dig." Dooce.com by Heather Armstrong is the one in particular that started this madness and the rest have resulted from there. It's mostly a group of women who blog about being a mom and the daily "joys" of this adventure. There is no handbook, all kids are different even under one roof and it's a true blessing to watch them develop. Point be proven in the following conversation that I had with Tim last night. Some days I would like to pry open their little minds to reveal the factory of crazy ideas and sayings that are produced inside their little brains.

Me: Tim, you want some ice cream?

Tim: Yeah

Me: You want it in a bowl or a cone?

Tim: Cone

Me: Are you going to eat the cone?

Tim: No

Me: Then why do you want one? Why not just use a bowl?

Tim: I don't know.

Me: How about I get you a bowl?

Tim: Fine, I'll eat the cone.

Me: (inside thoughts) What just happened? I changed his answer. How did I do that? Wonder if it works for homework too?

Did You Pee Yourself?

2009-04-20T12:08:00.000-07:00

No, I'm just a klutz. You'd think I would have learned by now to not lean across a public restroom sink in order to check myself out extraordinarily close because, if you haven't noticed by now, there is always water all over the counter. Suddenly in the interest of checking myself out I ended up getting water on the front of my pants. For a split second I contemplate making up a story about how the automatic water sensors went on a fritz and sprayed water so hard that it shot out of the sink and all over my clothes but then I shoot back to reality and go with plan b. Shoving my pelvis as close as humanly possible to the hand dryer on the wall to dry this embarrassing mess. Cause looking like I'm getting frisky with the wall is better. Jeez. What is with my karma lately? This was right up there with my shower by candlelight last week. Purely not out of choice. If only I could afford to solar power my home, buy stock in Tide pens and master quick change artistry for bathroom faucet frenzies. Big dreams.

Your Spelling Word Is...

2009-04-15T10:53:00.000-07:00

Just added to my quick fact file was the following statement.
"A Sphygmomanometer measures blood pressure."
Say that three times fast. Hell say it once! " Dear Lord, tell me there is an easy pronunciation to this word. Some rule that makes half the letters silent. Is it crazy to ask for words to come with a warning attached to them?

I Heart Pencils

2009-04-14T08:38:00.000-07:00

Absolutely love them. I am a dedicated pencil fan and would stand up any day and take a pencil over a pen. Being somebody who over analyzes I have an inner urge to always have an eraser located in a nearby proximity. I assume that I developed this love of pencils partially because I like to draw / doodle constantly. That scratchy sandpaper sound of lead on paper, and the smell...that's right, smell. It happens right after you've sharpened it. Kind of like lighting a match, that split second lovely chemical smell.

Changing the subject now... Tim recently asked me "if a Dairy Queen catches on fire does it burn slower because everything inside is frozen and cold?" All I could do was shake my head and say "I'm sorry" it seems I've passed on this sickness of analyzing randomnesses.

Out Of Service

2009-04-10T11:54:00.000-07:00

What do you do when your head isn't working? When it's one of those "blah" days and you can't remember anything or get motivated. Your mind wanders all over the place and all you really want is to go out with some friends and have a good time? When your thoughts are so blurry you don't even know if they qualify as solid thoughts or closer to something resembling mashed potatoes. Mmm, that sounds really good to eat. Anyhow, I found myself going to get online earlier and then sat there as the seconds compounded into minutes, thinking to myself "what the hell was I getting on here for? Was I checking my email? Shopping? Paying Bills? Going to Web MD to look up why I feel like I'm on the verge of early Alzheimer's but only occasionally? What the hell? I don't feel like I'm a spazz or anything but wonder on some days just why my brain decided to take a vacation and not notify me. That's just not cool. I could use a beach, some cold drinks and hours to waste basking in the sun too! I mean, couldn't we all?

Think Different

2009-04-09T06:01:00.000-07:00

Being that I love all things creative and work at an Interior Design & Architecture firm I see many "different" designs thrown around. It's refreshing to say the least. Knowing that the imagination holds so much limitless power. I frequently like to visit a site called http://www.thisnext.com/ when I'm looking to do mindless activity for a few moments and I came across these yesterday during "mindless time" The first a "Shawn Lovell Tree Bed" which is way cool. Maybe more suited for a young girl with a forest or fairy princess themed bedroom. Regardless, still interesting.

This next bed I found and just had to add because I think it is possibly where the easter bunny sleeps and therefore festive with the upcoming holiday. The "Lomme Bed" shown below. The imagination is a wonderful thing!

We've Made It So Far

2009-04-06T08:36:00.000-07:00

Rafe sent me this video recently. It's so incredible when you sit back and look at the big picture of how we evolve as a society. How far we've come at this point. After this video the thought that kept running through my mind, or question rather, is this: Are we better off with all of the modern tools or with simplicity? It's noted in the video that we know today so much more than even shakespeare. Yet, even today we study his works in literature and revel in the insights. On another note though, if we are this evolved and truly can process the multitudes of information in our everyday lives that is thrown at us then what exactly is ignorance? Even the most ignorant beings are still intelligent in a sense....compared to the past. So ignorance is relevant to the surrounding circumstances. Anyhow, watch the video. It's interesting to say the least and will give you something to ponder.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cL9Wu2kWwSY

Things That Make You Go "Hmm"

2009-04-06T08:08:00.000-07:00

I love tidbits of information. Nibbles of random you could call them. For now...here is some show and tell with an appetizer of commentary too!
Did I spell commentary right? Oh well...

- In Helsinki, Finland, instead of giving parking tickets,
the police usually deflate tires.
I would be PISSED to say the least. I guess this is one way to get the message across though. I suppose in a sense it is the "capital punishment" of traffic violations.

- Coca-Cola was originally green.
Wonder why it changed to brown? Wonder why it was green? Just think, green soda in a red can. It would be like drinking Christmas, ha! Ok that's probly only funny to me.

- Pineapples do not ripen after they have been picked.
It's like the fruit is laughing at you. Taunting you to pick only at peak perfection or be doomed and forbidden from enjoying such sweet fruit. I say "not cool pineapple god!"

- Alexander Graham Bell, never telephoned his wife or mother.
They both were deaf.
Odd. A headscratcher indeed. This one perplexes me, in a way that I enjoy of course. Makes me ponder human interaction and motivations. We are definitly a complicated species.

- It takes about 142 licks to reach the center of a tootsie pop.
Good to know, now I can check this experiment off my list! I wonder if there are different levels of acidity in peoples saliva though. I may possibly be able to reach the center in less licks! Wonder if I could get a trophy for that!

- The average woman consumes 6 lbs of lipstick in her lifetime.
I'm guessing my intake is double at least. At any given time I have at least 2-4 chapsticks, glosses or lipsticks in my purse or a reachable by arm length radius. Maybe that's whats wrong with me. Lipstick intoxication. Ha ha ha! Ah, I should see if I can get that one published in the medical journals!

The Mass Insanity

2009-03-31T06:42:00.000-07:00

So, I'm answering phones at the front desk today and for no apparent reason I start wondering random things. This happens all the time. For instance, if there were no planes in the sky flying from place to place would the world be less windy? They create wind...along with cars driving ect.... Just imagine if all transportation and movement came to a halt for five minutes...do you think the wind would stop? Now, hang in there with me, if this notion were true then does that mean that on especially windy days there is simply more movement happening in the world? Is that why Chicago is "the windy city?" Simply because they have so much going on?

Then, again, my mind jumps to pringles...yes thats right! Chips! I'm suddenly wondering if you get more chips in a tube of pringles or a bag. The tube looks smaller but the whole tube is full. You buy a bag of chips and suddenly you seem to have decided to invest stock in air as well cause that damn bag is half air! Don't they know that their chips may have a longer shelf life if there was no air in the bag. Air causes food to go stale, I want vacuum packed chips damnit! Then again...maybe that's the point. If the chips go stale, we buy more. The insanity, at least it's not just inside my head!

Pink

2009-03-27T05:10:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking pink may be the ultimate color....next to black and white of course. Black and white go with everything...but that's a given. Some people would argue that they aren't "colors" but pink, nobody can argue that pink isn't a "color" I mean really. To boot, it goes with every other color. I truly cannot think of a color it doesn't go with and I'm looking for somebody to challenge this thought because out of 28 years of life this simple thought just occured to me yesterday! It goes well with orange, brown, yellow, red, green, blue, purple, white, black and different shades of those colors also. I may be somewhat partial because pink is my signature color...well fuschia I should say if we are going to be all technical. That lovely mix between pink and purple, that to me, represents a sort of "passion." Like the stain in your cup after drinking grape juice. So nice. That's another thing, I've realized, over the past few years, that I have this habit of linking colors to foods when I'm describing them. Hmm....odd, but I'm sure that's a whole other blog post in itself! Pink....in my opinion....a most versatile color!

Sugar vs. Salt (beware fine print warning of addiction)

2009-03-19T06:42:00.000-07:00

I have serious issues with my addiction to sweets and occasionally salty items fall into my crave category. I don't know how health nuts do it. I can eat fairly healthy on a regular basis. Still,..I crave the likes of many yummy, sinful, treats. Right in this very instance this topic brings to mind samoa cookies, riesen candies, movie theatre popcorn and bubblegum to top it off and hopefully tear me away from my need to shovel food in my mouth that is so bad for my health! I've read that if you eat healthy for so long then you no longer crave junk food, instead doing the ultimate justice to your body. You start actually craving healthy items with vitamins and calcium and things loaded with true goodness and not just fake superheroes that live in crave land. My question is...how long does this "detox" of sugar and sweet craving take to get out of your system? I eat healthy, yet never make it to that point where my mind says "hmmm, I think I'll go fix a nice snack of celery" Really?? I think it sounds ridiculous, and yet I want so badly to be the person that craves good food so that my body will thank me.

Do I Prefer?

2009-03-18T12:42:00.000-07:00

I'm realizing that it's much easier for some people to know what they like and don't like. For others, like myself, we need to experience an emotion with an event before being able to form an opinion. I feel like some people just....know...what they want out of life. So matter of fact. With no regrets or questioning. I am not one of those people. At times I think it may be easier to be that way but then again. If I were, then years from now when I'm a grandmother telling stories over and over again because I can't remember which stories I've already told. Hopefully my listeners won't get quite as bored because I have many more stories, experiences to pull from. I learn the hard way.....by going through it and not just tiptoeing around it. I'm confident that there are many others in my boat........so for those of you passengers sloshing along with me......I hope you enjoy this blog as I figure out my perspective and preferences in life.